The Divine Secrets of a Southern Diva

I KNOW that I’ve not blogged in forever- Oct 18 to be precise, but I’ve been BUSY! Between work, babyfest 2009, traveling and houseguests my time has been stretched superthin.  I’m not bitching, though. I’m just ’splainin’ why I haven’t been around.  I like my  life like this, I just need a small break.

Like my two week vacation I’m on RIGHT NOW.  Holler!

So, I have lots to blog about but that will have to wait for another post because this one is reserved wholely and solely for the anticipated 2009 CHRISTMAS VIDEO.

Enjoy!

Chillaxin’ and Relaxin’-
Ali

Miley Cyrus is going to be in the Sex In The City movie.

What in the fuck? Why must you spoil my bff homage to all things awesome with that little twat? A piece of my soul just dried up and shriveled.

New season of Celebrity Apprentice starring Brett Michaels and Rod  Blagojevich.

That’s the folliclely challenged leading the folliclely challenged. If you don’t know who Rod Blagojevich is, he’s the loser Illinois governor who tried to sell Obama’s senate seat after he was elected president. And Brett, well, there are some hot chicks on the show, so maybe he’s confused and thinks he’s getting his pee-pee sucked on another edition of Rock of Love. Either way, absolute fuckery will ensue. Rod is a crazy mother. I saw him on The Daily Show. Outrageous. This just gives John Stewart more fodder.

Cindy Lauper and Sharon Osbourne are also on the show.  GOD I hope Sharon and Rod get into it and she dumps a red drink on his fluffy mountain of hair.

This picture of Fergy, because, ew. EW a thousand times.

Bones, House and Fringe are going away until November and baseball post season is over.

Total sadness. Bones and Booth are thisclose to making out again and they pause. SAD. And I love Fringe. And House, too! Honestly, I feel Fox is hating on me a little even though I watch something on that network nearly every damn night of the week. CRY. Lets look at an Agent Booth  picture to soothe our pain, shall we?

Ah, that’s better. Somewhat.

I’m still on a freakin’ wait-list on Netflix for How I  Met Your Mother season 4.

I realize everyone wants to watch that awesome show (especially since the world has a boner right now for NPH), but Netflix needs to sack-up and get more copies. It’s been out for 3 damn weeks! So now, I’m just storing all of season 5 on my damn DVR until I can watch it. Eff, eff, a. thousand. times. eff.  Do you know how hard it is not to read spoilers, man? SO HARD.

One thing that’s definately right with the world? My niece playing on her new swing-set/fort thingy.

Houston. Unfiltered.

This is a new tumblr blog that Mike and I have started. It’s dedicated all things Houston-things we capture on our cell phone cameras, food we eat and the interesting people we meet along the way. It will be a little less sassy (and curse-word riddled) and more artsy and informative. Why? Well, why not.

If you have a tumblr account, start following us or simply add us to your rss feed!

Well, it’s taco time. Mmmm, tacos. Mike’s been begging for them so I need to get my cook on.

Adios amigos.

-Ali

It’s so sad, really. I love to write.  I just don’t seem to have the energy to do anything remotely creative when I get home. It’s like it all gets sucked out of me at work.

BUT, I’m going to make myself do it more often. If I don’t, y’all have my permission to beat my ass.

So, lets bullet point the highlights of life since I last blogged, shall we?

Jersey Vacation- Lots of fun. The shore was beautiful, as was Mike’s aunt and uncle’s condo which they so awesomely let us use.  Mike’s cousin’s wedding was a blast, too. I got all sorts of tore up. GO FIGURE. I blame Mike, though. He was bringing me one vodka cranberry after another on a mostly empty stomach. How am I supposed to control myself like that? That’s like drinking candy. It was great spending time with his family. We don’t get to do it near enough.

My niece said “douche”. I didn’t get to see it, but it was a proud moment for Nanny.

Tom Delay left DWTS due to fractured feet. I can’t believe he lasted that long. Whoever voted for him is dumb. There, I said it.

Danielle and Scott came visit. We had some nice lunches and dinners and threw some darts. It makes me wish we all lived closer.

I got to hang out with Meg and Josh while I’m in Indiana this week.  We had so much fun- they took me to a fabulous restaurant where we relaxed and had a long dinner and talked until they kicked us out. It was great and I hope they take me up on my offer to come to Houston!

MOST IMPORTANTLY… Mikey’s art exhibit opened!

I’m so proud of him! The photos looks amazing (and were the best there in my humble, unbiased opinion).  The whole family went and then had a lovely dinner at Gravitas. It was a fantastic night and I really couldn’t be more proud of him.  Go read his blog to see his photos and how excited he is!

That’s it in a nutshell. I’m enjoying my time in Indiana, learning a lot, enjoying the fall weather and, of course, eating. I get to go to another conference in Nov at Microsoft where Coca-Cola’s Social Media Director is a key note. EEEEKKKK. That makes me giddy.

Promise to try to write more! Honest.

Heart,

Ali

Both my actual TV and my new TV.

We got a new HDTV for the living room and moved the living room HDTV to the bedroom. We got all high-tech up in this bitch. No more standard def! (Hey, does anyone want to buy a nice but ridiculously heavy standard def tv? It’s really, really good!)

So, since I got a new TV lets talk TV!

Mike and I are Netflix subscribers, but we really hadn’t been watching that many movies. So we decided to use it to catch up on TV shows that we heard were great but never got a chance to watch.

The first one we watched was Mad Men.

Seriously my new found favorite show. The plot revolves around Don Draper, the mysterious Creative Director 1960’s ad agency in Manhattan. He (and everyone in the show) drinks heavily, smokes and has lots and lots of sex. The sets and wardrobe are stunning. They capture the essence of the period like nothing else. Women in the office are beneath the men and basically nothing more coffee catchers and sexual objects. I my favorite parts of the shows are when they work on new campaigns and ad pitches. The companies are real: American Airlines, London Fog, Heineken, Popsicle. Everything about it makes me giddy. And, lets face it, Don Draper is walking sex.

Mike wrote a great blog about it.

Next up, True Blood.

Now, I LOVE the concept of this show. Vampires have come out of hiding and tried to integrate into human society. It’s a supernatural depiction of race issues. The biggest obstacle for me to get past was the Louisiana inconsistencies, but that’s been somewhat cleared up. But, let’s be clear: this show it total soft-core porn. The amount of fucking that goes on in this show would make Traci Lords blush.  I mean, if I’m watching porn, I’m expecting dirty, dirty sex. Not really expecting it here. AND the way they kill vampires? SO freakin’ gross. I much prefer the Buffy-verse “dusting” vampire deaths. But I’m still diggin’ it.

So, yet again, I’m hooked on a vampire show. I KNOW, get rid of your shocked faces.

Now, we’ve worked our way through 2/3 of How I Met Your Mother.

Total hilarity and heart. A rare combo in a sitcom. Neal Patrick Harris’ character Barney has the greatest “isms” in that show.  I may have to start taking notes on them and put them all in a blog. The premise is a narrator (Bob Saget) is telling his kids in the year 2030 the story of how he met their mother starting in 2005. And every episode is a story leading up to the revelation who actually is the mother.  Fairly unique concept in a time when sitcoms are nearly extinct and the ones still on the air are a bland mess.

So, yes, its TV central up here. And I love it.

Oh, and let’s take a minute to chat about the new Dancing with The Stars lineup. Now, I watch this show for some good dancing. And I will admit that they’ve had some ridiculous “stars” on this show before. But this season they put Tom Delay in the line up. TOM. DELAY. The shamed Republican congressman from Sugarland who also happens to be a misogynistic asshole.  Hey, here’s a little quote from ol’ Tom regarding Columbine: The causes of youth violence are working parents who put their kids into daycare, the teaching of evolution in the schools, and working mothers who take birth control pills. Yay for wholesome family fun! We need to ban together and make sure that motherfucker gets the boot day 1. I hope he makes a gigantic ass of himself. I mean, Lil’ Kim and her “First time I watched DWTS was when I was in jail” was bad enough. Now this? Sorry to get all political-face, but he sucks much cock and should NOT be Fred Astaire’ing all over my new pretty TV!

Ok, moving on.

Right now, we have about a week before we leave for vacation. A few days at the shore eating boardwalk food and taking moonlit walks on the beach, visiting Mike’s family and going to his cousin’s wedding. I can’t wait!

Mike’s opening for the photography exhibit he’s in coming up after that. We’ll be planning a get-together around it, so let me know if anyone is interested in going.

I’m off my friends. Keep it real ‘n shit.
-Ali

Also, shout out to all my pregnant people. Seriously, don’t let me drink the same water you are drinking. There are 9 of you in total. That is some serious harmone action going on!

She sold me on that solo. GOD, the pirouettes into a paused attitude.  Hello?! THAT alone should make her the winner. And that PASO.  Katie Swick, THAT is what I’m talking about when I say Paso is my favorite Latin Dance. That was easily the best I’d ever seen.

I think Brandon was great. I think Kayla was great. I think Evan was decent. His dance with Brandon really showed his weakness, I thought. GOD HELP ME IF HE WINS. I’d be ok with anyone else beating Jeanine but not him. She just draws my attention no matter who is on stage with her. She’s got really strong features and just this presence. Plus, I dig her eyebrows. I know, that’s a weird thing to focus on, but they are black and thick and perfect. Just like her hair.

I’m not sure how I feel about them in the Kodak theater. On one hand, I love that the show has gained so much popularity that the finale can be in there but on the other it seemed to be distracting. I didn’t like the red everywhere. I think it took away from the dancers. The think I love so much about the SYTYCD set is that it’s a light silvery gray that lets the dancers and the costumes pop. That kinda got lost there.

But WHATEVS. Jeanine should win. Final. Done. THE END. I have spoken.

In other news, I partied like I was 22 on Saturday and I’m so NOT 22. You can peruse the pics below. It was loads of fun. I’ve been hearing around the office that some people are sad they weren’t invited but I DIDN’T DO THE INVITING, MAN! So Kristy and I will take it upon ourselves to plan a monthly outing with everyone who could ever possibly want to go and get their Karaoke on.

I also wrote a blog for work over social media. Go check it out.

And Mikey’s birthday is this weekend. My family is coming over for dinner Saturday and Sunday we are going to dinner at Josephines. It’s this delicious traditional Italian restaurant, just like in the movies. The name is over the front door in cursive, the table clothes are red and white check and Italian music serenades you as you eat. And omg THE CANOLES. Faboo. We’ll have to get some photos when we are there because they don’t even have a website (the horror!).

Enjoy the pics!

-Ali

A few weeks ago, Mike told me about a photography contest put on by The Houstonist. He was interested and started looking into some of his work to see what he would submit. Then, the last day submissions would be accepted, I asked him about it. He was all *shrug*. I was all *DO IT*. And he did.

He had two photos accepted! Out of 200 entries they accepted 60. And TWO are his.

It’s funny because I didn’t really read about the contest. I skimmed it. It’s a contest. I thought it’d be cool if he was chosen. I also thought they’d just accept all submissions. Seriously.

But OMG it’s an actual exhibit. In a gallery. Showing for a month. AND THEY SELL THEM. Like, for a few hundred bucks each. There is even an opening party and all that fancy business.

The exhibit is called 600 sq miles: Hidden. It’s all about finding hidden gems in Houston and viewing them with an artistic eye.  The show starts Oct 9 and will run through the month at xnihilo Gallery, right down the street from our house.

I AM SO PROUD OF HIM!

These are the two photos chosen:

Blinky – taken at the corner of West Grey and Montrose.

Happiness ♥- Taken in Forest Cove

Anyone who wants to go to the opening, pre-party at our house!

-Beaming
Ali

Man, I love this picture. This so us. All three of us. Me, Carrie and Amy. Lord knows what we are singing. The picture was taken at Nick and Crystal’s wedding in October of 1999 where Carrie and I were bridesmaids (if that weren’t obvious from the matching dresses). Aside from her own wedding, this is probably the last time I threw down with Carrie like that. She moved to Dallas after college and we just didn’t keep in touch. I kept up with her through Crystal mostly.

Today marks 1 year since we lost Carrie to brain cancer.

I didn’t blog about it at the time. I tried to. I had some pictures up and a blog all worked out in my head but when I’d go to write it I just couldn’t. I don’t know why. I think part of it was shock. I knew she was sick. I knew they’d found a tumor a few years ago. But somehow, in my head, I thought it was ok. Like, Carrie would just be ok.

Crystal called me a few weeks before she died to tell me she’d taken a turn for the worse. I wasn’t home and it took me a while to get back to her. Between work and planning a trip to Cabo for my brother’s wedding, I was just busy. When I finally did talk to her, I didn’t have any time to see her before my trip. I got the call that she’d passed in the airport when arriving home.

I think, too, it’s how she died. It wasn’t a freak accident that sometimes happens to someone so young. It wasn’t the fault of another person. It was cancer. My friends shouldn’t be dying from a disease like that. We are too young. That’s what happens to adults, not us.

When I think in my head that she was 35 and I was 33, we sound like adults. That’s an adult age. I was 12 years old when my mother was 35. But to me, we are still kids trying to make our way. She’s always going to be the chick that could rock the halter top, mini skirt and thigh-high platforms when we went out for Crystal’s 70’s themed bachelorette party and I will always be the chubby yet adorable chick with the tiara and glitter and big mouth.

Carrie was handful, I’ll say that. She was a bombshell. Tall, super athletic, long hair, tan. She had a big personality, too. She and I clashed on more than one occasion, but that’s what happens with two big personalities. She liked to be in the spotlight, just like me. And she liked things her way. Just like me. She was super competitive, too. Which I am, but in different areas than she was. But beyond all that, she was caring and funny- so sarcastic which I love. She loved to have a good time and she loved her friends.

Nick suggested that today be “Carrie Day”. He thinks we should all go out and do 3 random acts of kindness in honor of Carrie. I think that’s fabulous. As much as I know she’d want us to be thinking of her today, she would want us to be happy and remember all the good times we had together.

We miss you, Carrie!

-Ali

PS: J-E-L-L-O!

500 Days of Summer is a quirky love story with a slight twist – it’s told from the dude’s perspective. It’s not like that is the first time, but generally those dudes are spineless whiners who let the chicks treat them like last week’s Chinese takeout. This wasn’t like this. This was a tale of boy meets girl, boy falls in love, girl is unsure and the relationship ends. It details not only the relationship, but the devastation of the break up and the heartache it can cause. It shows how being in love can cause you to see things through rose colored glasses, misinterpret events and lose your perspective on the world around you.

No one mistreated anyone else. No one cheated or took advantage of another. It was simply a story of a love that didn’t work and how gut-wrenching it can be when one person is more in love than the other.

Zooey Deschanel looked gorgeous. She was in her element as Summer, starring in a quirky film with a vintage, old Hollywood look showcasing those giant blue eyes and pale skin framed by thick dark bangs. Stunning, really. Her character was sweet and fun and hip – and she made everything around her better.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt was fantastic as a love-lorn believer in “the one”.  He wasn’t a guy who dated much or was really passionate about anything until Summer. He was a dude who was going through the motions of life, working at a job he hated instead of his passion of architecture. And then there was her.

It was funny and touching. But mostly it was real. It resonated with me because I’ve been in that relationship where someone else was my world but I wasn’t theirs. It’s hard and there are a lot of pieces to pick up in the end. I love that it portrays the relationship, the break up, the aftermath and the new beginning. It’s the cycle of love and life.

Bonus that we saw the move at the River Oaks Theater. Mike and I joke about that particular strip of West Gray where it’s located being Houston’s LA. It’s lined with palm trees and all of the architecture is completely art deco. It houses great restaurants, shopping and the one 1930’s age movie theater still in operation in Houston. We’ve said for a long time we wanted to go, but this was actually our first trip. I love the beautifully carved artwork on the walls and the grandeur of the big theater. I’m definitely glad I signed the petition to not tear it down and want to see lots more films there. It has a quaintness about it and a quiet elegance of old Hollywood that is missing from most modern theaters today. Extra bonus for the European cafe we discovered next door. I had the most delicious eclair and coffee.

The rest of the weekend was spent having dinner with my two aunts and my grandmother at PF Changs, brunch today at Harry’s some shopping and a trip to Amy’s ice-cream.  First time for both Harry’s and Amy’s.

Harry’s was fantastic. We both simply had pancakes and eggs, but they have a lot of greek-inspired breakfast items that I plan on inhaling on my next visit.The service was great, the prices were low and its about a 2 minute drive from my house.

Amy’s, however, was eh. Great look, fun flavors but at the end of the day, they just aren’t on par with Marble Slab. The place itself was fun- brick walls, stained-concrete floors, indie-rock blasting with tons of fun colors and artwork. It has a totally Montrose vibe, like an ice-cream parlor for hipsters. But, I like my ice-cream served with some friendly service. I don’t want to feel like I’m being judged by a tattoo’d “intellectual” scooping up a cone full of Mexican Vanilla. I expect that kind of shit from Cafe’ Brasil and the like, but an ice-cream parlor? The ice-cream wasn’t near good enough to warrant that. So, F from Ali.

Otherwise lovely weekend. Getting my hair cut tomorrow. Setting the world on fire with my mad blogging skills. Planning a family reunion and a spa party. That’s what’s going on with this girl.

-Ali

WARNING: IF YOU HAVEN’T WATCHED THE RESULTS SHOW OF SYTYCD (AND YOU CARE) SHUT THIS HO DOWN NOW. Cuz there’s spoilers ‘n shit.

100th episode! Big Katie Holmes buildup! The performance was ok. Singing was ok. Dancing was ok for as much as she actually did. I mean, that was EASY shit.  However, I’d have actually been proud of that crap HAD SHE DONE IT LIVE. And they tried to make you think she was! With the obvious video then cutting away to the performance on the actually SYTYCD stage that was actually pre-taped. That was such build up for nothing. It’s like pre-mature ejaculation. So much excitement, so little satisfaction.

And Jeanette and Jason left! SAD. FACE. SAD, SAD FACE! I was fully expecting Kayla and Brandon. I would have been ok with that. But NOT Spicy Tamale and Pretty Feet! NO NO NO.

*sigh*

On an up note, someone posted this on Facebook. I need y’all to vote. Should Mike and I rock this when we actually cough up the cash to do the big deed? Sarah? What do you think?

Boogie’n my ass to bed… well, watching Buffy then making with the boogie’n.
-Ali

The dancers on So You Think You Can Dance are so fucking amazing. Normally by this point I’d see a clear winner emerging. But this year? SERIOUSLY, people.

Tonight’s dances were just ok until the last few. Then it was like BAM! Out come Jeanine and Brandon and change the game. The war dance was so great. The intensity and the power.

Then there was Tyce’s ode to breast cancer. I mean, really, really RI-DIC-U-LOUS. The concept, the execution the everything. Not only was the choerography and the message moving, he had the two perfect dancers to perform it. Ade, the powerhouse embodyment of strength and Melissa, the delicate, pasty white ballerina as the patient. Truly, truly amazing.

And then the Shane Sparks hip-hop that ended the show with Kayla and Jason. So great! The popping was hard, they were totally in sync and in character. Just perfection.

Until I saw the Tyce routine I thought for sure Melissa was out of there but now I don’t know. The girls are all so good! Really, Jeanine is so strong and dances like she IS the dance. Kayla can simply do anything plus she’s stunning. I would eat babies to have her legs. Janette is a little spicy tamale that can do any damn thing you give her. And Melissa just did a routine that made freakin’ Nigel cry. I mean, OH MY DAMN.

And the dudes? I’m still not sold on Evan as a partner. I think he’d be great on Broadway, but in partner dancing and over all? No. Ade? Holy mother of chocolate is he fantastic.  He’s cool and smooth and giant and he just throws those chicks around like they are dolls. His flips and jumps and kicks are incredible. And he’s got this sweetness about him. Brandon is a fantastic dancer, but I can’t put my finger on what I don’t like about him. Just something bugs me, but he is amazing. And Jason is so effin’ cute and sweet and his technique is fabulous. He’s got the best feet on a dude I’ve seen since Travis.

So, who do I pick? I don’t know. They are all fucking fabulous. Can we split the prize, like, 8 ways?

Also, fair warning! I may have a new TV addiction. I watched the first two episodes of Mad Men and I love it. Whoever the creator and producer is, I tip my hat. The sets and the clothing and the authenticity of the time is WILD. I love it. And, after seeing that, if I lived in the 1950’s, I might have gone to jail for knocking the shit out of asshole sexist men. There is one scene where the head steno chick is showing a new girl around the steno pool. She rips off the cover of a typewriter to reveal it and an intercom. She tells the new girl something like “I know it looks high-tech and complicated, but it’s really not. They make them simple enough for women to understand.” And everyone smokes everywhere. It’s so odd to see.

I’m going to leave you with this for Katie. She’s officially a Bones fan and wants lick David Boreanez. I’m turning people, one at a time. mwahahahaha.

Lick lick-
Ali